Fulltime loneliness…

We were having an interesting discussion at accountability the other day – what is said in accountability stays at accountability… but in your opinion, would it be worse to be married, but lonely… or single, and lonely.

So, that was a slightly different start to this post – I would like responses – but I spent the entire day trawling through files to find bits to put in a database, and I was alone for 7 1/2 of the eight hours. I much prefer having other people in the room… especially since my media player has like 90 minutes of music on it right now, and I listened to the same songs Thursday and Friday… I’m off to put some new content on it.

“Cheaper than chips”

I’m not actually sure where that saying comes from…

I am unashamed about the fact that I love a good sale. The bigger the discount, the better. Having said that, I was trying to think tonight when the last time I brought something at full price was (excluding things like gas and food obviously.) I brought a new cardigan last week… but beyond that, I’m not sure.

I like the fact that I have two Columbia winter jackets, which both cost under $110NZ together, despite the fact that one of them would cost at least $200 in New Zealand. I like the fact that tonight I bought a pair of work shoes at an 80% discount. I like the fact that creative at the mall was having a sale, and I found some New Zealand-ish gifts which I bought at very cheap prices, which I can take with me when I go to the States.

Having said that, I don’t want to have a spirit of poverty around my life. Blessed are the poor in heart, yes, but not blessed are the mingy, the ones who freak about how they don’t have any money, and the ones who get grumpy at offering.

I still struggle at times with this… I think about the big picture (like the fact that I am going on a trip for 10 weeks in just over 10 weeks, and I have very few savings right now…) and freak out a little… but then I look at God’s faithfulness, and that I know he will provide.

So, with that intent… I aim to be a seriously extravagant giver. I like getting my tax receipts back and seeing that I gave far more than I thought I had. Not out of any sense of duty, and not out of a “If I give, I get blessed” mentality… but simply because God was so extravagant towards me… if he did not spare his own son… amazing, amazing.

I am exhausted.

I don’t know why I’m so tired – it’s not like I’m BUSY or anything.

Not that I know when the last time I had a sleepin… and a whole day with nothing that I ‘had’ to do was… and it’s not going to get any better. I’m working 6 day weeks for the next 11 weeks, and then my 7th day is Sunday, and 4 out of 5 Sundays I’m serving on either tech or cafe… both morning and night.

At least there’s no internship. And there’s no office work to be done… except for Oregon conference, and a website, and the prayer room week… (nothing at all, she says sarcastically.)

Like, take right now. I’m sitting in the tech room, because itunes wouldn’t work on the intern computer in the office, burning 15 copies of a CD for the kids conference this weekend. Except, I finished work at 4.30 and spent half an hour looking for my keys (which by the way were sitting on my car seat the whole day – with the door unlocked!) and got here late, and then I’ve had a million and one phone calls and I need hermit time pretty badly.

It was a very good weekend though. Interns graduated, hung out with friends, went out with a group of people to Lonestar for my birthday last night… now I’m tired.

Four days of work to go… then its Saturday afternoon and sleep time…

Birthday

Yup, today was my birthday. Went out with a crowd to Lonestar restaurant in the city… I got the small portion size, and still didn’t eat at least half of it. I like my people here… but I was also aware that I miss my people all around the world…

This is my shoutout to all my internationals… miss you, wish you were here… but I’ll be over to visit sometime.

‘Who understood the times…’

1 Chron 12:32 talks about the sons of Issachar, who understood the times and knew what was required.

I can’t think of a  much better qualification than that… well, okay, I can think of a whole lot… but that’s a very good one. I definitely like that as a description of my life… I want to understand the season that the Lord is moving us into, but to be able to respond in action accordingly. I don’t want to sit on the sidelines while my sphere of influence is shaken, I want to be in the midst of it, representing the one that my heart belongs to.

Seasons have shifted quite dramatically for me over the last month… I’ve gone from housesitting, being part of the leadership team for two internships, working at Starbucks and working at church, to living at home again with my sister, and a fulltime job at the HVDHB (with Starbucks to make up extra hours.)

The interns are graduating tonight… it’s been a great twenty weeks. We’ve had 11 young adults do the Onething Internship, and 8 (older) adults complete the pioneering Nocturnal Internship… we’ve prayed, laughed, cried and watched as God destroys our lives in order to rebuild. However, with the end of the internships, my staff commitment at Hope Centre has also come to an end, and I started a new job late this week which will take me through until September when I leave for two months in the USA. I’m working as the ‘project administrator’ for a branch of the Hutt Valley District Health Board… basically I do admin stuff on the hospital campus.

I’m still in charge of the Hope Centre prayer room… we have a 24/7 week coming up in August… and I’m organising details for this conference in Oregon City. As part of my trip, I’ll do a month in Oregon, three weeks in Kansas City, and then probably a week in Florida… all to be confirmed.

I’m pressing in though… I want more of Jesus… I want to see the hospital having revival (did I mention I know three other Christian girls on staff…) and most importantly, I want to continue to walk in God’s plan for my life… I want to be significant…